Endless sleep awaits me

Rolling with the punches

Just going with it

The way the universe wants to take me

And I follow

But I can’t help but ask why

I know the universe always knows my intention

Why must I suffer so much

I wanna give up

I want to let go and free fall into the abyss

I’m ready to go home

This world wasn’t made for my kind

Society will call us weak or selfish

But I feel we’re just too sensitive for this selfish world

I wake up

I do what needs to be done

I’m blessed in certain ways I guess

and cursed in others

But the pain continues to sweep over me

A tidal wave so big it’s hard to breathe

I keep gasping for air

And it’s been such a struggle

I just want to let go

Let it be

Let the water take over me

And relax into an endless sleep

8 Comments

  1. Hola, buenas noches,

    I don’t know if you gonna read this, but I still want to leave you this message.

    I just saw your stories and I’m amazed of how people can be so heartless. I’m really sorry for you, you opened yourself up and you got a lot of thrash from horrible people. The world is full of bastards, and social media gives a loudspeaker to everyone, and that includes all kind of damaged stupid, but that doesn’t mean that what they say is true.

    I’m sure that here’s a lot of people following you that don’t forget that you are a human being, like all of us, and life is not always easy. Unfortunately, you attracted an audience with problems in their heads, and those problems where exposed in their comments.

    Anyway, world can be so cruel, like you said, it wasn’t made for your kind, but it is full of beauty and love if we know where to look. I wish that everything will be good for you.

    I love your work, Emily. I’m sending you good energy.

    -Roberto

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’m so happy and relieved to see you post another piece. Hadn’t seen you post anything and your twitter seems to be run by someone else after your “Letter to Myself”. At first, I thought you went on vacation then I feared the worse, and still you do sound melancholic in this latest offering. And I do empathize! If you were able to read any of my comments from “Letter to Myself”” and my piece,”A Letter You Will Never See”, I hit a low myself. It escalated into having to ask my “X” for a favor (denied). And my sweet 16yo son coming to my rescue. Yes, I thanked him and excused him from defending me in the future. Kidz!?
    So,”Endless sleep awaits me”! Well, since you posted this, I assume you took no action, thank you very much. But, you know, you are anything but a victim. You made a commitment to see so many things through. I won’t go into detail since this is public but you know this. You’ve built a sustainable empire out of your social media creations. You’ve kept many, if not all your promises. The people that truly matter, love you and they know at least some of your sacrifices. You are a truly Amazing human being, Em. I’m proud to know of you and hope to learn more about you.
    So, why do we suffer? Well, this is the question the Buddha sought to answer. I’m not sure. What comes after suffering? Enlightenment? I used to see this with my patients(their parents). Adults tend to repeat the same patterns over and over expecting a different result. This is a common theme. Good news! You, sweet Em, are NOT common! I believe you can and Will break free of this pattern. When you’re ready. You will do this for the same reason you built your business. Sure you wanna give up. I have too! Most recently in “A Letter You will never See”. Life can really Suck! Why go on? My kidz. Having the opportunity to know someone truly exceptional like you, Em. If I “check out” I’ll never read another of your shares from the Soul. Another of your paintings. News of the ducks. Your next project on the Farm. Another sunset! A chance at meeting my soulmate! Lmao
    There’s No question that you and other artists are very sensitive. You perceive in ways others do not. It’s what makes me wanna know an artist despite the negative stuff. An artist friend of mine, he has pieces installed at the Phila. Art Museum, called me outta the blue earlier this week. I was afraid he was dead (alcohol). We talked for over an hour and he remembered that I had paid him a commission to make me an original piece. Never thought I’d see him, or the commission again. He was totally sober and was calling from Southern Cal. Please don’t “let go”, Em. Please find your “courage to be”. There are people that love you and they would be devastated without you. I know I’m no one to you but I would truly miss you. I missed you and you were just delegating your social media. This life is short. You’ve already done more than the average. I wish I could make you flowery promises but you’ve had those and it’s not what you need. I’m selfish! I wanna read your next piece! lol I’d be willing to pay you a commission! 😉

    Like

  3. The heart of heaven longs for your arrival home, however eternity is an awful long time to be stuck indoors. Especially for an adventurous brave soul. Your heart sings along with the universe sometimes in tune, sometimes not. Cherished either way, you can sleep all you want, feel like a leaf in the wind, lost, unloved, unwanted, forever. If that’s what you want, pain can be the only friend, reliable and consistent. I like to believe in the impossible, an immeasurable desire to test infinite potential. The abyss is only a blink of time.

    Liked by 1 person

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